Sex Therapy - A Sex Therapist Can't Revive My Lost Libido or Can He?

woman on sex therapyman at sex therapistFor any sexually active woman, loss of libido can prove to be extremely distressing. Not only does it affect the woman's sexual activities, it also affects her relationship with her partner. Lack of sex drive translates into no sex in many cases and can turn out to be a marriage or relationship breaker.

There are various ways to boost your sex drive.

  • You can try herbs such as tribulus terrestris, horny goat weed (epimedium), mucuna pruriens, damiana, etc., or herbal pills that contain a blend of these.

  • Vitamin supplements containing a combination of vitamins A, B, C, and E can also boost your libido.

  • Foods such as bananas and oysters can act as aphrodisiacs and improve your desire and arousal.

  • You can also try over the counter arousal gels and creams that can be applied around the area to increase sexual sensation.

However, these things will only help if the reasons are mainly physiological in nature. If your problem has a psychological cause, you will need to consult someone who has a deep knowledge about sexuality, about relationships in general, and about how sex drive can be improved. This is where a sex therapist can help you a great deal.

Who Is a Sex Therapist and How You Should Choose One?

The area of sex therapy is not really regulated, so often, a psychiatrist, marriage or relationship therapist, a psychologist, or even a clinical social worker can act as a sexual therapist.

There are a few organizations in the United States such as the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists and the American Board of Sexology that certify sex therapy. However, not all the sex therapists that you will find in your area are certified. But then, just because they are not certified, does not mean that they won't be good at all.

In fact, a knowledgeable general physician may also be able to help you out with your sexual dysfunction problems. What it means that often the exact qualification is not what is required for the success of a sex therapy session.

Often, the more important thing is how comfortable you feel with him or her. Sex is an embarrassing issue to discuss, especially for a woman. So, you should choose someone with whom you will be comfortable sharing your sexual problems and discussing steps on how to resolve it.

Besides comfort, you may want to consider if the consultant has some sort of expertise in the problem that you are bringing to the session. Maybe your problems are related to sexual abuse, so you may want to pick someone who has experience with victims of sexual abuse.

If your problem is related to a sexual dysfunction, you may choose someone who is more experienced in providing you psychological help and, if required, medical help too. If your problem is related to relationship issues, choose someone who is an expert in opening up the lines of communication between you and your partner.

What Happens in Sex Therapy?

A sex therapist will usually be very direct in his or her approach. They will be asking questions and expecting clear answers. Direct suggestions may be given and information may be provided about different aspects of sex.

The different aspects of sex may include educating you and your partner about the sexual response cycle. It may involve teaching ways to improve desire and arousal such as spending more time in foreplay. What women like. What men like. Ways to improve your sexual intimacy. How spending time together and touch can help improve sexual desire. These are questions that your sex therapist may help you get answers to.

You may also be given some exercises to try in between sessions. For example, they may teach you how to use sexual touch to improve your desires and then the next session may be focused on how it helped. If it did not help, what were the obstacles that you faced.

If lack of communication or lack of emotional closeness is an issue, the sex therapist may help open the lines of communication. Why you don't feel emotionally close to your partner. What is it that is missing in your relationship? Are you too tired or stressed out? Are you bored with your life? Can a break from work, kids, and life in general help you? Are there trust issues? Has there been any infidelity in the relationship that you are finding hard to get over? Are there any other emotional issues such as a loss of a child that is making your feel depressed?

These and many more questions can be addressed in a sex therapy session. Simply put, your counselor will try and find out the reason behind the loss of libido and then try to work with you to find a solution for the problem.

You can consult a sex therapist whenever you feel that you are not happy with your sexual life. Lack of sex drive can affect someone who is in a relationship or someone who is single. The point is that a sex therapist is someone who is qualified and more experienced in sexuality than your family and friends. So, he or she can definitely help you work out any of the sexual problems that you may be facing.

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